


Don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose.

by The_Vigilant_Unicorn



Category: The Fosters (TV 2013), The Fosters (TV 2013) RPF
Genre: 18!Jude, 21!Connor, Adorable Connor, Alternate Universe - College/University, Cop!Connor, Eventual Smut, Likeable Daria., M/M, Obsessed!Connor, Playboy!Connor, Student!Jude, Virgin!Jude, Will change to explicit when the smut comes., Yes that was a bad attempt at a pun.
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-12
Updated: 2016-09-03
Packaged: 2018-08-08 07:36:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7748956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Vigilant_Unicorn/pseuds/The_Vigilant_Unicorn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jude Adams-Foster is just your average social outcast. A loner, little more. He spends his weekend playing chess with one of his Professors, and doing homework.</p>
<p>Connor Stevens is just your typical playboy. A slut, and a cop -Stef's new partner to be exact. That all changes once he meets Jude. An annoying grump, who only cares about his grades and his few close friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dr. Yang

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the song 'Terrible Things' by Mayday Parade. 
> 
> -Sorry in advance for any grammatical and spelling and punctuation errors.

**JUDE**

 

"Your late," I inform my lessthan-fashionably late Professer, "Doctor, and who's the one always pestering me about being late to class?"

Dr. May just rolled her eyes, and takes a seat across from me, sitting her abnormally large burgundy purse in the chair to her right. "But I'm not the one missing a lecture on Admission of Hearsay."

"Hey!" I draw out the word, personally offended, "I was three minutes late! And that was once." I'm quick to defend myself.

She gives a closed mouth laugh, trying to pass it off as just a smile. "Should we get started?" She asks, after a few seconds, gesturing to the already set chess board between us.

I smile, and move my first pawn from the rank. "So, meet any cute boys lately?" I ask, hitting the timer set beside the chess board.

"No," her word is long, as she considers her first move. "You?" She asks, moving a black knight. Typical May.

"Timer." I remind her, taping my fingers on the table. Siping my tea, considering the move I've already decided on.

"Why must we use a timer?" She whines, as I hit my timer.

"I like watching you squirm." I say, bluntly. "And to get back to your question, no I have not."

"Uh, nobody worthy of the esteemed Jude Adam-Foster?" She asks, taking a pawn I planed to lose.

I roll my eyes, "Let's just play."

And we do, like always, we play. I occasional sip my tea, which is lukewarm by the time I call check.

May pouts her bottom lip, and moved an irrelevant pawn. Unable to really do anything else.

"Checkmate!" I cheer. "What do I get this week?"

She groans, "Tell me again why I made this arrangement?"

"Because, you didn't think an eighteen year old could beat, 'Mrs. Checkmate 2011.'" I start to place the pieces in their places in my bag.

The redhead sitting in front if me reaches into her bag, and pulls out a black folder, and slides it my way.

"Five-thousand words!" I whine, pouting to myself. I look up, "If we play again, an if I win, can we make it three?" I pout my bottom lip, as far as I can.

"Sorry Jude," She says, collecting her bag and the coat she had laid on the back of her chair. "I have a lunch to get to, an old student of mine got into the force. Skipped right over the desk jockey work, and is partnered with practically a legend."

"Detective? Traffic? Patrol?" I ask, knowing very little about cops, even though moms a cop.

"Patrol, the only reason he's not a detective is because he's so new, only twenty one. Bye Jude." She said with a smile, "You better be on time for next weeks lecture." She practically yells, as she walks through the door.

It's only twelve thirty, when I check the time on my phone, so I had about an hour before the deadline to turn in a physical copy of research for Criminal Law I, seeing as how I spent almost an hour fiddling with the printer to print it out, that was a deadline I wasn't going to miss.

I took an Uber home, and ran in. When in my room I gave the woman a two star, 'Homophobe, wanted to converse. Annoying. Took quick roads/avoided traffic.'

I take the black folder in my bag, and replace it with a report case. I still have half an hour, and it's only a ten minute walk from the house to campus.

I step into the kitchen to find moms, standing close. Showing to much affection for my taste. "You know, you guys are the reason I'm gay!" I joke, shielding my eyes.

Lena jumps away from her wife. She doesn't like being caught. And her eyes dropping to the floor, avoiding her youngest son.

Stef enjoys the moment, her lips puckering to as smile to stifle her laugh. "Well someone in this house has to be getting it on. You're more celibate than a nun."

"You do realize you're talking to your son, right? Not one of your weird friends." I say, to my mother, who I honestly find disturbed.

She snorts, "You know, by the time the others were your age I'd caught them. Jesus, oh God, I'd caught Jesus about a hundred times. Come on, catching y'all is like a right of way."

Lena just goes and starts washing dishes, presumably from lunch. "God! You are to weird!" I practically yell, but I'm laughing.

I look at my phone, and tell moms, "I've got to go turn something in." I say, "Love ya."

"Wait!" Lena calls, before I can get through the hall. I turn, but when I look at mama, she drops her gaze. Still embarrassed.

Stef starts to talk, "I got a new partner yesterday, you know that James retired, and we invited him over for supper. Are you free?" She asks, I'm not sure if the last sentence is a joke.

"Yeah, why?" I ask, already knowing what she was going to ask.

"So, you'll be here?"

"Yeah." I say, turning back to the hall. "Love ya!" I shout, when I close the front door.

I walk a few streets, to campus. And straight my Criminal Law professors office. "Mrs. Ming?" I ask, while knocking.

"Come in." She replies, and I do.

"Mrs. Ming, I've came to turn in my research." I say, reaching in my bag. I pull out my report.

She presses her lips, "Cutting it close, are we Mr. Foster." I press my lips and nod, knowing how Mrs. Ming grades, out of anger.

I pass over my report. I stand there for a second to long, she looks up. Annoyed. "You may go." And I do.

I don't voice my thoughts, mainly because 'you remind me of Dr. Christina Yang' would probably make me sound weird.

I leave and go straight home, locking myself in my room. I start on my Evidence assignment.


	2. “Oh! Donuts! Yay!”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor struggles with an annoying Daria, on his first day on the force. Connor flirts with a random teen. Stef likes Coffee cake donuts, and black coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from the song 'Terrible Things' by Mayday Parade. 
> 
> -Sorry in advance for any grammatical and spelling and punctuation errors.

**CONNOR**

I wake earlier than expected, my nerves getting the best of me. For a second I consider waking the sleeping Daria for a quicky, but decided against it. The clock on my bedside table reads  _ ‘5:37’ _ . After a few moments of thoughts I come to a realization. I’m awake. There's no denying it, I’m up for the day.

Choosing to fully wake up I go for a run. Not a too awfly long one, just an hour. Simple. I’ll be fully awake when I get back, and my morning shower will feel better than it would if I’m already clean. Or as clean I can be after quickly washing off last night.

With the alarm disabled, I slip into a pair of sweats, and slip on an old pair of running shoes. I slip out my apartment. Not even waking Blue who’s asleep in her bed by the door. If I had I know she would want to run with me, but she’s getting old. She can barely walk a mile without needing a break.

I run in one direction until the sun began to peek, then I turned around and ran home. In total I ran eight miles, not as many as I hoped I would but better than none. When i got home, I ate a bowl of cereal and a tall glass of iced water.

My shower was hot, I didn’t even turn the cold nob. I washed my best, even taking the time to wash my hair. I’m done in thirty minutes, but just stand under the water for fifteen more. That's why I love my small apartment. The water stays hot.

I dry off, before stepping onto the bathroom floor. Wrapping the soft towel around my neck to catch any droplets. I bend down to the hairdryer from under the sink. When I stand straight, I take the towel and dry the body length mirror on the door. Before I can even dry the bottom, a lighter layer of steam has settled again.

I keep wiping it away, until i can see myself clearly. I hate to admit it -but honestly I don't- but I look hot. I know that, and I like just staring at myself. Letting my eyes creep over my body. Why can’t I? I’ve worked hard for my body. I deserve to be able to look at myself.

Eventually I remember, I have somewhere to be this morning. Put on a thick layer of deodorant, and a thin layer of baby powder - that lightly clumps on my damp skin. Then I step into my cold bedroom, feeling the central AC the moment I close the bathroom door.

I hear light movement in the dark room, and think Daria’s still asleep. Looking at my clock, I know that would have to change. I flip the light on, and call out, “Daria, wake up.” She bairly stirs in her sleep.

I walk over and shake her shoulder, earning a annoyed groan. ‘Daria, I’m not plating games. Wakeup.”

She gives a muffled, “No.” So I shake her harder, turning her over. Her face scrunches up, the light hurting her eyes. She whines, like a puppy.

“Daria, I have to get to work.” I say, shaking her. 

“Leave me!” She demands.

“Daria, I’ve known you since middle school, and I’ve fucked you since high school. You are the last person I trust alone in my house during the day. You’re the biggest klepto I know, and I know James. That’s saying something.” I say, letting my eyes wander over her naked torso. I groan at the dried… fluid, on her stomach.

“God Daria, you told me you were going to take a shower!” I yell, annoyed with my house guest.

She runs a hand over her lips, taking dring drool and cheap lipstick with it. “I was, I swear!” She says, raising her hands. “I just kinda took a nap, and it felt like you licked it all up last night anyway, so I just… took a nap.”

“Yeah, a six hour nap.” I say, annoyance the only thing in my voice. “Get up. Get up.” I shoo her away with my hands. She stumbles to get up, to the point where I have to help her. “Come on, hurry up!” I say, when she takes my hand.

When she stands, I pull at the beds fitted sheet. It comes up, and wraps around the other sheet and thick comforter. “Grabs the pillows,” I order.

“Why?” Daria asks, once she has a few pillows in her hands.

“I’m gonna put them in the wash, so I can put them in the dryer when I get home. So I can put them on my bed when I get home from a dinner tonight.” I don’t have to tell her this, but she’s one of my best friends.

It takes a few minutes to get the sheets and cover and pillowcases all into the washer, and when I do I almost take for the door. Only at the last minute realising I’m naked. Completely. It’s probably a bad thing that I’m this comfortable naked. But again, I’m hot.

When I check the clock, I realise I’m running later than I would hope. I quickly pull on a pair of black briefs, and the black pants of the LAPD. I slip my undershirt, and shoes at the same time. My navy shirt is on before I get to the safe in the my closet. I type in the code, 7588, and open it to my service belt, glock, and badge.

The belts on by the time I reach my phone and wallet on the bedside table, the gun secure before I’m in the bathroom to fix my hair. Badge on before I’m through the living room. I’m almost through the door when I remember. Daria.

Daria’s sitting on the commod when I open the spare bathrooms door, a joint in hand pissing. “Daria!”

The brunette jumps at my sudden tone, and her eyes widen when she sees my uniform. She lets the joint drop, and slams her foot on it when it hits the floor. She regrets it immediately, if the sudden yelp she gives is any indication.

She rushes to explain, “I can explain. I know you said no more smoking at your house, but I’m really stressed, I have to meet with Adrian today about that custody hearing. You know!”

“Daria, get dressed. I have to go, which means so do you.” I say, trying my best to ignore smell f weed, and the fact that my new partner is known for her drug bust.

“Connor, can I just stay?” She asks, looking up at me, pressing her lips together.

“No Daria.” I simply say.

“But Connor!” She whines. 

“No buts. I told you last night I had to be at work this morning, I even offered to drive you home.”

“Connor!” She whines, “I would have gone home last night, but you know how my mom is if I come home drunk.”

‘Not my problem.” I say, but then I feel my phone vibrate. When  take it out it reads, ‘COFFEE!” I silence the silent alarm, and know I’m way behind schedule. It’s eight, and the coffee shop down the street just opened. I should be there not here arguing with Daria.

“”Daria, how long would I be here arguing with you?”

She looks at her phone, “Seventeen minutes.” She looks up and smiles.

“Why the fuck seventeen?” I ask at the strange number.

She breaths, and her lips flap. “This test takes about twenty minutes.” She pulls a box out the trash can.

My eyes go wide, “A pregnancy test! What the fuck Daria! I thought you said you were on the pill!”

“Relax!” She says, like this means nothing.

“What do you mean relax?”

“If it’s positive, it’s not yours. Last month, when I went to Vegas, I forgot my pills. I had sex, Aiden wanted to make up. The week after we had a fallout. When I told my mom, she told me to stop the pills for awhile. I’m late, so I decided to take a test. Here so my mom won’t find the box.” I swear she has tears in her eyes.

“Okay.” I say after a moment. I reach in my back pocket, and pull out my keys. I ease off my only apartment key. I put it on the bathroom counter, “I have to go, put the key in my mailbox. 304.”

I turn on my heel, and finally leave my apartment.

I cross the street to the garage the apartment reserves a floor on. I’m quick to get to the sixth floor, one under the roof, and turn my car on. I drive the speed limit, not any under, to Tiff’s Coffee.

“Welcome to Tiff’s!” Calls a polite voice, I look to the counter to see a cute boy, with bright blond hair. He looks up from his book, and bites his lip. He stands from a stool, and it’s clear he’s tall.

“Hey,” I say. Leaning up on the counter.

The teen looks me over, biting a pen. “What could I get you, Sir?” The added ‘Sir’ gives me all the confirmation I need. This boy's gay. He wants a fuck. If I wasn’t behind schedule, I would invite him back to the bathroom, and show him what a real fuck is. But I’m way behind schedule.

“Umm, a box of three coffee and three shortcake donuts. Two black coffees, and creamers and sugars.” I look over his features, flawed upclose. “Please?”

He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, and nods. He takes his pen and points it to the other end of the counter, “You’ll pay over there.”

I turn on my heel, and wait by the cash register. It only takes three minutes for the boy to return, with a pink box, and a cardboard cup holder. He sits it on the counter, and I pass him my credit card. “Thank you,” He looks at my card, “Officer Connor.” He says as he slides it through the machine.

I open my mouth, in mock surprise. “It seems like you know my name, but I don’t know yours.” I fake a pout. He smiles, “Don’t you think we should change that?”

“Timothy,” He says, handing me back my card, brushing his hand with mine. “Tim.”

I pull back out my wallet, and put my card in. “I have to go,” I say grabbing the box.

“Have a nice day, don’t forget to come back.”

I smile brightly, “I definitely will, Tim.”

When I get to my car, I put the pink box in the passenger seat, and sit the coffees in my car’s cup holders. I fasten my seatbelt, and turn the key in the ignition.

I make my way to the station. When I get there is 8:53, and I see my partner standing by the entryway, waiting for her promised coffee and donut.

She’s on the phone when I get to her. “Ok, Honey. My partners here, I’ve got to go.” There's a pause. “Yes love, the inks in Jesus’ old room.” Another pause, “Love you too.” She hangs up, “Sorry, my son could get hold of my wife.” She rolls her eyes, like it's a common thing.

Her face lights up when she sees what I hold, “Oh! Donuts! Yay!”

I put the coffees on a nearby trashcan lid, and open the box, revealing the still warm donuts. She takes a coffee cake, and dumps it almost fully in her black coffee, downing the donut in a single swallow.

She takes another, doing the same. The the last coffee, for a second I think I should have got six of each type.

She’s ate all three of her donuts before I’m done creaming my coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random update! I know I said I would update Wednesday and Friday, but I couldn't sleep tonight, so I wrote the sixth seventh chapter tonight. So I decided to update!


	3. Emma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daria struggles to except the fact that all four test came back positive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from the song 'Terrible Things' by Mayday Parade. 
> 
> -The grammar and punctuation is how it's intended to be. Theses are the thoughts of Daria, they just run through her head. Shes struggling, and this was ment to be a fast write. It has more editing as it is, than it was suppose to have.
> 
> P.S. Sorry for the short update. There will be a longer on Friday
> 
> P.P.S Happy Hump day :)

**Daria**

_ I lied. I don’t know why, but I lied. _

_ It would have been just so easy to test out the words. Maybe then I’ll finally accept them to be true. That was my fourth test. I thought the first three might had been something wrong with. But no. Now there was no denying it. _

_ Staring down at the black plus on the pink test… it felt wrong. Dirty. Not a good dirty, like when I’m alone with Connor or Taylor at my place or one of theirs. I felt disgusting. I felt filthy, literally. _

_ I know its his. I just know it is, with everyone else I wore a condom. Even with Connor last night, even back on the pill for a good two weeks. _

_ I should tell someone. I know I should. Taylor or Connor. They'll understand. They might help me get rid of the growing infestation inside of me. But what if I don’t want to get rid of it? Is that a twisted thought? _

_ I’m already in this fail of a custody battle with Adrian. Imagine two. Would he even have to know? Should I tell him? If I get an abortion, and tell him, he’ll just use it against me in our full out war. Even if I just tell him I’m considering he’ll use it against me. I’ll bet they make me unable to get one. Use this as an excuse to call my sanity into question. _

_ The Judge is some right wing nut job. I honestly wouldn’t think it against him to order against me not getting one. Even if the mother doesn’t want it. The -reborn- father would love to take it! That's basically like walking into court with papers from the president to give him custody, that is if the old man didn’t hold his personal vendetta against Obama. _

_ I can't bare the thought losing Emma. Especially to that nut of a stepmother he has. She doesn’t let her express herself. She even made her get a haircut when she wanted to grow it out. The girls eight! She should be able to express himself! _

_ She even took her to their church. When she came to me that Wednesday crying, saying “The told me I’m going to hell!” They told a little girl she was going to burn in her for trying to express herself. _

_ When I called Adrian all he did was get mad and yell at me over the phone, “YOU'RE JUST ENCOURAGING HIS SINNING BEHAVIOR!” _

_ Yeah, that coming from a man who just last month cheated on his wife of two years with the woman he has a beautiful baby girl! I only have one thing to say.  **MY DAUGHTER IS NOT A SIN!** _

_ Emma is beautiful. She was even when we called her Eliot. She was always feminine. Until he started shagging that slut he calls a wife, Adrian would have excepted Emma. I know he would have. _

_ I’ve tried so, so many times to break them up. Going to the extreme of accepting his invite to Vages. Nothing worked. That bitch, Maddie, wouldn't believe me if I told her about our affair. You can tell by the way she treats her own daughter, she doesn’t believe it's her place to Judge her husband. She’s just stuck in the old ways. _


	4. "Live ya"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The start of the dinner from Jude's point of view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lateness! To try and make up for that I'm posting two! This is part one.

**JUDE**

 

I'm working on a paper for one of my minor classes when the doorbell rings. I'm in the study, and get up when mom calls, "Jude? Can you get the door?"

"Yeah!" I yell back.

I finish my sentence, and get up. I grab my two empty soda cans and head to the door.

When I open the heavyset door, a man stands on the other side. I take a moment to look him over. Dark jeans, white button down, slim tie. It all clicks.

I glance down at my watch, 7:56. Yep. The man on the other side of the threshold is Officer What's-his-face. Moms new partner.

I screwed up. I promised mom I'd be ready by seven, yet here I am. Standing at the door in a pair of sweats, and an oversized shirt. I'm just making it worse by just standing here, so I step out the way. "Welcome," I say, trying to hide the Dr. Pepper cans behind my back.

He nodded at me when he passes through, weird. I close the door, just in time for Lena to round the corner. She smiles big, like one of the real house wife's greeting a guest.

She's not annoyed at the guest, like those women, but probably mom. Who's nowhere to be seen. "Connor," she says, reaching to shake his hand. "I'm Lena, Stef's wife, Stef stepped upstairs for a moment. She had to finish up some paperwork." She looks at me, her smile clothed mouth now, still wide. I take the hint.

"Excuse me," I say, "But I'll go grab her real quick." I try to smile, while I leave. I pass through the kitchen and dump my trash on my way to the stairs.

When I get to moms' room, I knock softly. I don't wait for a replie, I know she's decent. She's had her outfit on since she got home. Mama didn't want what happened to me to happen to her.

When I open the door she sits at the desk on the opposite wall. "Hey," I call, softly.

"Hey," she replies, not turning her head. I walk the room to stand by the desk, and I lean down. Putting my chin on the top of her head, where here hair is a mix of grey and blonde. "Jude, love, how can the world hold such cruelty?"

I look down at the file in front of her. Basic work, just signing an affidavit saying she was the first in the scene of a murder last week. There are some pictures in the file, and from my first scan it seems like a drug deal goon wrong.

A woman was found in a warehouse, with only a prepaid phone, and a few empty baggies.

"I don't know. We have company." I say after a minute.

Mom lets out a long breath. "Ok." She says, moving to get up. "Love ya."

"Love ya," I say before making my way to my room. I change fast. Into black jeans and better fitting shirt. Nothing fancy, just something I would wear out. I contemplate weather shoes are a good idea, Mama was wearing green heels that matched her dress, but the only thing that would go with what I'm wearing are my converse. In the end I decide against it.

But do wear a pair of black socks. I know how bad Mama would chew me out if I when's downstairs bait foot

Moms are talking to our guest when I join them. Mom's put her blond hair into a bun, and the grey's barley visible.

"Jude, this is Connor." Mom introduces us, "I think you only meet briefly?"

I nod, and see the guest extend his hand. That's something I don't do. I don't shake peoples hands, or fist bump, or high five. I think it makes me look awkward. But I can see mama and her fake smile, so I extend my hand to shake his.

When they touch I jerk my hand back, instinctively from the strange feeling. I shocked him, I wore socks and shocked our guest. "Sorry!" I blurt out, my face cringing.

He flaps his hand a little, surprised by the shock. "It's ok." He says, he says it weird. Like he's spaced out, but then he smiles. It's almost as big as Lena's, and seems realer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote in a rush. Something wrong with computer so I rewrote this on my phone.


	5. "It's ok."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter from Connors point of view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second part uploaded today.

**JUDE**

 

It about six when I get home. Daria's long gone, and the keys in the box where I told her to leave it. But the doors unlocked. She didn't lock the damn door. Who does that?

My bitch of a best friend, that's who.

I shed my uniform and eat a bowl of cereal. I strip my underpants on my way to the bathroom, and shower.

I let the water soothe my aching muscles. Today was boring. All we did was ride around in the patrol car, Stef seemed preoccupied.

I made sure to get her address. That would have been awkward.

In the shower I rub one out. Not thinking of anyone in particular. I do recognize Tim's face in the passing, and of course Daria. But it's not like I focus on them.

After I come, I rush through the rest of my shower. I was my hair, although I know the pain of simply getting it wet. But I'm out of shower caps, so boo-hoo.

I blow dry my hair and let my body drip dry. Walking into my cool bedroom I start to dab at the sensitive areas with a towel.

I try to think of what to wear. I probably should have planed that out. But no, I was … occupied last night.

After minutes of contemplation I decide on dark navy jeans, a button down, and tie. I look good. I look hot. Why do I feel like I have to look hot? I don't know but still I do.

I'm out my door and I'm my car by seven-thirty. My GPS tells me it'll take twenty minutes, so I don't make any stops. I can't risk being late.

I'm there way early, so I ride around the block. Twelve times.

When I stop, I pull into the driveway. I check my phone before stepping into the chilly night.

I ring the doorbell, and wait. I count the seconds forty-seven. That's how long it takes for the door to open. On the other side I see… I don't know.

He's cute. Maybe hot. He's maybe an inch shorter than me. He has dark bags under his eyes. His eyes are brown, a dark earth. His skin a pasty pale. Why did I take this in?

I never notice things like this. I notice your maybe hair color, if you're lucky. He's too cute. He looks young. Is he even legal?

Why the fuck is my heart racing?

"Welcome," he says, moving to let me in. I give a nod. I don't know why, but I don't trust my words.

We just stand there for a minute, before I hear my name, "Connor!" I turn to greet the approaching woman with an extinguish hand. "I'm Lena, Stef's wife, Stef stepped upstairs for a moment. She had to finish up some paperwork." The woman smiles, she looks familiar.

"Excuse me, but I'll go grab her real quick." Says the cute twink. He leaves and I watch him go, his hips swaying.

"So…" Lena starts into a dialogue about police work. I think Stef said she's a teacher or something.

After about two minutes Stef joins us, and we all talk.

A few minutes later we are talking about the political race, when the boy comes back. Stef introduced us, "Jude, this is Connor. I think you only meet briefly?"

Jude -such a lovely name- nods shortly, and I reach out for a handshake. He hesitates but follows suit.

There are sparks. I can feel them. Jude jerks back his hand, and utters "Sorry!"

I shake my hand, it's going num. Jude made my hand go num. "It's ok."


	6. "Pass the peas?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dinner party. And Connors night after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. Fridays update will be on Saturday because on me. Sorry once again.

**JUDE**

We start dinner. It's a roast beef, mashed potatoes, roasted carrots, peas, and homemade rolls. It's a rarity that we eat anything other than pizza or ramen, with moms working and be spending most of my days in the study.

It's not like when the others were around. Now it's just me, mom, mama, and Zoë -our cat. "Where is Zoë?" I ask out load, meaning to in my head. I look up from my plate and turn red. I've interrupted their conversation.

They're all silent for a few seconds before Lena speaks up, "Um… she's upstairs, in the spare." She purses her lips, annoyed by my outburst. "So anyway," she turns back to our guest. "Jude here's majoring in Criminal Justice."

This is my simple punishment, conversation. She's pulling me into their small talk. "You are?" Asks Connor, curiosity lining his voice.

"Yep," I cut short, until I see Lena looking at me. I go on, "I wanna be an attorney." I reach for the salt in the middle of the table, but can't reach it. So, shyly I ask, "Um, could you pass the salt?"

Connor, who's sitting beside me, reaches for the salt and passes it my way. "Here." He says, when it presses into my hand. When he withdraws his hand he kinda jerks it away, but try's to cover it up. If I wasn't so observant I wouldn't have even noticed it. I don't think anyone else does.

I work my way out of the conversation, starting to respond with grunts and ingle words. Why must a simple meal last an hour? Even when the whole fangs around we normally only thank half of that.

In twenty minutes my plates clean, but because I know how much Mama wants me here I start seconds. The only things missing from my plate are carrots and peas when is wait for a pause in conversation.

"Um…" I start, weakly. "Could you pass the peas?" I ask, and as soon as it's said the bowl of peas is pressed into my hand. "Thank you. " I offer.

Connor nods, and the smiles. Again. He's almost as weird as me. But not as weird.

I pace myself, trying to keep the slow pace Lena sets. Her first plate looks like my second still. So I play with my food, trying to make it look like I'm eating more than I an -one plate being enough for me.

Twenty-three minutes. That's how much longer it too everyone to finish their plates. Lena smiles around the table, "Shall we have dessert in the family room?"

Stef gives her a loving look, and replies "Why not," before standing. Less classy than Lena would have liked but it gets the job done, for Connor goes to stand.

I'm unsure what to do. I know moms go into start on the dishes after serving dessert, and that I should help. But again we have company. Do I eat desert with them? Do I excuse myself to the study? Do I help with the cleanup? I settle for excluding myself.

I look at my wrist watch, a present from dad a few years back before his accident. "Look at the time," I start with the cliché. To my surprise our guest actually does. "I have a paper due tomorrow, that needs a review." I lie, knowing damn well that I turned that sent that paper in already.

And with that I excuse myself to the study, to read a book in psychology. In the time it takes me to read the book I've gone through through three Dr. Pepper's from the mini fridge hidden inside one of the large cabinets on my desk.

**CONNOR**

I like him. I know it's not like I like-like him or anything, it's just that he's hot -but needless to say, I like him.

From what his moms were saying about him throughout dessert -the best damn dark chocolate cake I've ever had- he's smart. Like genies smart. Like doctor smart.

I think he's gay. He looks gay.

I know that's being stereotypical and all, but he looks gay.

Why do I care? It's not like I can fuck him. Yeah he's legal, but he's Stef's son. Not her birth son, but still. Even if we had something noncommittal it's not like it would be hard for her to find out.

From what Chief Mike told me when assigning me to her she's a real hardass when it comes to her kids. It wasn't suppose to mean anything, just something in passing, but when that boy opened the door it came back to me.

To be honest, I couldn't tell if he was hot or cute. He's not like that Tim fella, who try's to be 'cute.'

Whatever he was seemed natural on Jude. Such a lovely name. Jude. It just rolls of the tongue.

Not like Carl, who I planed to meet tonight for a drink. I should hurry. He's expecting me in ten minutes.

I get in my car and drive.

<(•_•<)<(•_•)>(>•_•)>

The night goes alright. At about two I kick Carl out, not in the mood for another Daria. But it's not like I didn't compensate with something nice.

I bottomed tonight. It hurt, but only because it's been a while since I last bottomed. Carl couldn't really hurt anyone. He's just genetically meant to bottom, but I did plan on kicking him out.

I even gave him a rim job. Something I rarely do, not even twice a month on Daria! He seemed pleased. He was the type to try and settle down.

I've known him for about a year, and I think he thinks the rimming was a step in 'the right' direction.

The truth was, I was thinking about Jude the whole night even now.

When I was on my back I immagen end Jude being the one fucking into me. When I was tasting Carl all I could thing about was how good Jude would taste.

Even as I lull into sleep I'm thinking about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment any suggestions. It really helps.


	7. 'First Response'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daria ruins Connors day off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a terrible person. I'm sorry it's late. Apparently my local hospital has a parietal block on the WiFi on the kids floor, and my little sister was there yesterday. She's abetter now, it was just my day to be up there with her. But still that's no excuse.

CONNOR

I'm on top of him. His eyes glare down to my torso. I don't think he intends to. He's just shy. That'll have to change. I want to look him in the eyes when push into him.

I'm naked. He's not. He has on a pair of black briefs. Why does he still have on a pair of black briefs?

I lean down and moan into his neck. "Jude," he taste sweet, with a salty hint of sweat. The taste is faint, but there.

He squirms when I drag my tongue down his neck to his shoulder, and dig my teeth in. Lightly, but sure enough it'll leave a mark. It's say he's mine. I want him to be mine.

"Jude," I moan again, again dragging my tongue down. I latch on to a hard nipple. Sucking. He moans, and I've won.

I lift one hand from the bed above the boy beneath me, when it touches his side he giggles. Who the fuck giggles during sex -is this sex? And why does it make me even harder?

I pull of his nipple and start to kiss down his stomach. Seventeen kisses. That's how many I get before reaching the waistband of his briefs.

I bite it, pull it up, and let it snap against him. When I try to do it again his hands come to push my face away. I look up and he's starring at me.

I want to do something. But I can't.

I'm interrupted. The banging on my doors what wakes me, pulls me from my fantasy. "What!" I yell into the darkness of my room.

"Let me in." Comes an annoyed voice. It's Daria. I haven't talked to her in three days. Since the day after my dinner with the Adam-Fosters.

I told her about Jude. And the fact that I got an awkward boner that morning thinking about him, while having a conversation with his mom about the proper way to pronounce 'pecon'. Of course I argued 'Pe-con' and she argued 'Pe-can.'

I gave her a key to the apartment -having to make a copy- after she complained about her mom locking their door after eleven. That gives her only an hour from the time her shift ends at David's Grill to get home.

She whined so much I offered her one of the spare bedrooms in my apartment.

It's not like she isn't always here anyway. Twice a week she's over at her friend Taylor's, and refuses to answer her phone. From what I can tell Taylor wants commitment. Something I know Daria will never give.

"Connor. If you don't unlock this door right now I will bust this door in!" Daria threatens through my bedroom door.

I groan, "Coming!"

"Connor!" She continues, "That better not mean what I think it means!"

This makes me laugh. Remembering the time in high school she came over and knocked on my door when I was jerking off, thinking it was mom I yelled 'Coming!' Before Daria used the key I hide above the doorframe to come in. She was hysterical for half an our, joking about how I shout out when I'm about to come.

Ever since it's been a joke between us.

"It doesn't." I say, getting up from my bed just to realize how cold it is. I'm at the door and unlocking it when it's thrown open.

"You don't have a plus one to that party tomorrow, do you?"

I'm thrown off the the question and hesitantly ask, "Dr. May's?"

"Yeah," She throws out like that's obvious. "Do you?"

"No," I wipe a hand across my eyes. "But I wasn't planing in going, weren't you going with Taylor?"

Daria adverts her eyes, "She told me to ask you. She said that since I won't commit and go official she has other people who she can take," Now she's shifting her weight in her feet.

"Daria, are you telling me the truth? All of it?" Again she adverts her eyes.

"Maybe not so calm." She admits in a mumble.

"Then who is she taking? I though she said you were the only one she's seeing."

"I am. She's taking her friend. Best friend," she adds bitterly. Daria likes Taylor. A lot. It's just that she doesn't do commitment. She can't.

"She's known him since high school. I've meet him like twice, he's nice and all. Just weird. Gives off this strange vibe." I almost laugh when she physically shivers, "Like he knows more than he should. More than he could possibly know."

"Can't you just ask Taylor politely? What's the worst that can happen?"

"She can say no. Or that's she's already given it away." Again she says this like its obvious.

"May's her mom, it's not like she can't ask for another plus."

"Connor please?"

"What do I get in return?"

She thinks for a minute. "If you take me to the party, you get to pick anyone -girl or guy- and I'll invite them to a three-way." When I don't answer right away she goes on, "Connor! You know how much you like three-ways! And it's been so long since our last."

"Alright. But if I chose a girl I get first dibs."

She steps back with one foot, and a hand dramatically placed on her chest. "Of course! What type if woman do you think I am?"

"Honey that's simple," Comes a voice from behind her, "A harlot."

She pivots on her foot at the voice, and when she does I stand in clear sight of a ginger in a leather jacket.

"Taylor!" Daria yells, surprised by her friend.

Taylor sighs, "Of course. I went by your place, and your mom told me to come here."

She's coming through the apartment's door. "I tried knocking, I've been waiting ten minutes. I was about to leave but then tried the door." She casts a a general gesture to the door, "I wanna talk about this." She says, reaching into her jacket pocket pulling something out.

Taylor holds up a small cardboard box, 'First Response' is printed on the box.

"It's not what you think!" Daria's quick to defend.

"Really?" Taylor gestures to my naked body, and for a moment I hate that I sleep bare. "It's not what I think? It's not what I think!" She's yelling, and I can tell she's on the verge if tears.

"You wanna know what I think? I think you've been lying to me. I think you haven't cut your sex down to just two people. You wanna know why?

"Because you just offered him a threesome. A FUCKING THREESOME WITH A STRAGER." She throws the box our way, before turning and leaving. Slamming the door in the process.

And with that, my day off is ruined before it even starts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Or rather goodbye if you're reading this. I don't think the dream part was nearly smutty enough to deserve a rating change. Comments really help. Thanks. I'll go now. See you soon.


	8. "'I did not have sexual relations with that woman'-esc."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jude's thoughts on the upcoming party.

**JUDE**

I didn't sleep well last night. Or this morning. It's almost twelve, and I'm already tired.

I'm in the middle of a lecture, but instead of typing out notes I'm writing a paper on why women have a harder time in life. I'm practically copying the paper of the same topic from tenth grade.

But where that had a five paragraph maximum, this paper must be ten pages long. I don't go into specifics. Keeping my discussion on the Pink tax short. Not even going into statistics.

I want to go into specifics, but I know the way the grading program works.

The teacher runs it through a simple software that searches for mistakes. Using general words, and long quotes the software won't recognize my paper as my own. It will suggest my teacher read it for himself.

Why go through the struggle if writing a paper no one will read? I'm only seven pages in. Twenty three paragraphs do far.

It's hard to stay on topic. I want to talk about the difficult of getting an abortion. But alas if I start on abortion I stay on abortion.

I acknowledge the draft, but counter with the possibility of a change in the law. It's not my best work, but my minds only have attentive.

I'm honestly more focused on finding an excuse to skip the parts tonight. Technically I'm not invited. But as Taylor's plus one others can't call favoritism.

I've headed about this event immensely in the past few years. Taylor ranting about all the people who've achieved.

Taylor opted to skip college and go straight into graphic design. She hates going because everyone brags.

Taylor was upset yesterday. Almost mad. When I tried to ask why she averted the question. Simply saying, "It's something with Daria."

I think that's the only reason I excepted her invite. She rarely talks about her female friend. I call her that because I don't know what else to call her.

The one time I met her was when she showed up unexpected at Taylor's when I was over. She seemed nice enough. Not perfect, but pleasant.

She introduced herself as a 'friend' of Taylor. I could tell by the was she looked at Taylor they were more.

Taylor denied their relations, very 'I did not have sexual relations with that woman'-esc.

Anyway. I don't want to go to Mrs. May's party. It'll be boring. That's bad coming from me, but it's true.

Last year Taylor face timed me when she got board, and all I could see was people in suits. The music was light and classical.

I'm still thinking about tonight's party when the people around me start to leave. I shut down my laptop, and wait for the crowds by the door to disperse before leaving.

I walk home, with no more classes today I decide the best thing to do is take a nap. I strip from my jeans and crew neck.

My room is cold and my covers warm. Perfect sleeping conditions if you ask me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments really help.


	9. "Connor, right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night of the party.

**CONNOR**

Black slacks and dresses. Everyone's wearing one of the two. Even Daria who I've never seen in any thing other than skinny jeans or a thong.

She chose a muted green dress. With her hair up in a messy bun she looks more cute than hot, but still attractive.

We make an attractive couple if I must say to myself. Not like we could ever really be a couple, neither of us are really up to 'real relationships.'

We even match tonight. When Daria went dress shopping yesterday she found a tie the same green as her dress and nails.

My outfit is simple, the same as when I met the Fosters, except a green tie instead of black.

Most of the other guys I see wear expensive suits. Some people look out of place, holding themselves strange. You can tell they rented their suits, they don't have the confidence of someone who owns a Ermenegildo Zegna or William Fioravanti. They just simply don't.

I should know, I grew up around men who owned suits worth triple what they wear. I have a few good suits, but this isn't the right place to wear such things.

I'm gonna have a hard time finding someone for Daria's promised threesome. I wanted another guy, but they're all so fake. Trying to hide behind their money. They don't know what real money is. The cost of having it.

I got out of that life, Dad's still in it. He's sold his soul to the devil, or rather criminals. He started as a respected lawyer, but money changed him. I remember before he started taking on clients like Samuel Likenn. The most feared man in possibly the whole of South Carolina, or at least those who know his name.

We had it good. Gramps left a large sum to dad, more than some people make in their life time. Dad just wanted more.

I know what it takes to be filthy rich, and none of these men have it. They still ching to humanity. They still can. I want someone who can't someone as fucked up as me, Daria's close but isn't perfect.

She stands out to much. She can't blend into the background, she has to be in the foreground.

She normally wears bright, liquid lipstick. Her hairs been bleached, and died time and time again. Her skins naturally even, and she's always showing off to much.

She doesn't want to blend in. Probably due to some daddy issues she has. Always craving attention. Her dad never loved her, her mom died during childbirth, so he felt if he loved her he had to hate Tiffany.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when Daria abruptly stops out lazed walk. I look ahead of us and see May.

And a young redhead in a pale blue dress. They look the same from this far away, like mother like daughter.

"Come on," I whisper under my breath to Daria, starting in the pairs direction.

"I can't! She's with her mom!" Daria protests.

"If she's with her mom can she yell at you? Yes, but it's highly unlikely." With a displeased grunt Daria starts to walk.

"May!" I exaggerate. "It's been so long! What was it this time? Six days since I've seen you last?"

Looking my way she smiles. "Connor, you know what? I believe it has been." She takes me into an embrace, and I try to ignore the look Taylor's giving me.

"And who's this lovely lady?" She asks when she pulls away. "A girlfriend perhaps?"

I give a light chuckle, "Sadly no. Just a good friend I've known since high school."

Taylor snorts, and May looks back at her with a questioning glare, but turns back with a smile and hugs Daria. "Nice to meet you."

"The pleasures all mine, Connor's been talking about tonight all week. I had to see it for myself," the truth is I didn't even know about this party until Wednesday when I checked my email. But Daria could charm the gills off a fish.

"It's pretty packed tonight," I inquire, "Have you kept in touch with everyone here?"

May looks around, "Honestly? No. I sent out a email to everyone from my classes last year. I couldn't tell you the names of most of the people here if you payed me."

Something behind me catches her eye, she smiles, and I'm tempted to turn around. Years of manners won't let me.

"There's someone I want you to meet, he's the highest this year so far, just like you were." I turn.

I must be seeing things, because I see Jude. The Jude. The Jude I jerked off to the thought of just a few hours ago.

He reaches us, and hugs May. "You canceled on Wednesdays session!" He pout. Literally pouts. "I needed more work, I've been stuck writing a paper, and it's boring!"

May laughs. "It's not my fault. Blame Taylor."

Jude's expression changes, more annoyed. He turns to Taylor, "What this time?"

The girl rolled her eyes, and they landed on me. "That's a story for a later time."

"Jude I have someone you just have to meet." May exclaimed, a weird excitement in her words. Jude turns to her, and she looks to me.

Before I know it there's a hand out stretched to mine, "Connor, right?"

He knows my name. Of course he knows my name I've meet him before. But he remembers my name. Of course he remembers my name, I'm Connor Fuckin' Stevens.

That's what one side of my brain tells me. The other sides caught up on how nice it sounds coming from his mouth. How nice it would be to hear him whisper and moan it.

Neither side responds. So Daria steps in.

"You know Connor?" She takes his hand, and I wish I had.

Jude doesn't seem to notice, but both gingers look at me. May confused. Taylor with a look I can't quite place.

"He works with my mom."

<(•_•<)<(•_•)>(>•_•)>

Daria's in the bathroom and I'm starring. Jude's wearing dark grey slacks, and a vest a shade lighter. A plane white button down and a blue silk bow tie bring the outfit together.

His outfit's one of reasons I'm sitting. The other is his ass.

I sit straighter when Daria comes back. "What the fuck was that?"

"What?" I sip from my glass of water.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about. You froze up. Connor Stevens doesn't freeze up."

"I didn't freeze up."

"Connor what's on your mind?"

"Nothing. Are you ready to go?"

"We've only been here an hour."

"I know, I'm just not feeling well." It's the truth, "If we leave now you don't have to do the threesome."

I've already got plans tonight. Not that I'd tell her that.

With that she just mumbles under her breath, and starts toward the door.

<(•_•<)<(•_•)>(>•_•)>

I called Tim. I got his number one morning picking up coffee, and thought what the hell.

I try imagining Jude. But I can't.

Tim -with his blue tipped blond hair, and fem. demeanor- insist on being a bottom. He told me he would be the best ass I'd ever fuck. He was wrong.

He has no ass. He has no legs. He's flat. Flatter than even Carl.

Not only that he tries, and fails, to be cute. He sucks his fingers, and calls me Officer. He's not even all that tight, and he comes in fifteen minutes.

He gives me a blow job when he comes, to finish me off. He's terrible. He's not even cute to look down on.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic. I would really love feedback! I hope to update twice a week Wednesday and Friday, but with school work, I may only update Fridays.


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